Revenge porn: What exactly is embarrassing about sex?

news-image

I saw my first revenge pornography tape when I was 17, this was allegedly two National University of Lesotho students and it was shown to me as a warning on how having sex would ruin my life. That was 10 years ago. Imagine my surprise then 10 years later when an alleged Free State serial rapist and ANC member released what he alleges is revenge porn but what looks more like a video of someone being raped to me. Let’s move past the fact that the girl in the video looks very much coerced and take his word that it was consensual. If two people had consensual sex and one released a tape with the aim of embarrassing the other are we saying that a woman having consensual sex has something to be embarrassed about? What exactly is embarrassing when an adult woman has sex?

This video is by no means the only example of society treating women’s bodies and their sexuality as something to be ashamed of. In 2015, a vengeful ex released South African Pulane Lenkoe’s naked pictures causing a social media frenzy, a few months later a tape of an obviously younger than I would have preferred Sesethu playing with a mini vibrator causing again her morality to be questioned. Just last year, the Parliament of Lesotho banned South African entertainer Zodwa li Bram popularly known as Zodwa wa bantu from passing through their borders to perform at a musical gig in Maseru. This is the same town where a group of male strippers working under Pulse Dancers regularly performs at one of its biggest hotels. I have been to the Pulse Dancer’s show and no one was even checking our identification to determine our age. So a group of men on stage getting fully naked is okay but one woman dancing provocatively without her underwear would surely throw the country’s morality to the wolves?

I would be convinced that the Government of Lesotho for one held women’s bodies in such high regard except that the very same who released the rape tape has been allowed to walk freely across our borders time and again since the incident and he even announced himself to prove that nothing would befall him. It appears then that the country is only against female nudity if those women willfully show off their naked body but a naked female body shown against her will is something they are very comfortable with.

In every sphere of society, the idea of a woman having sex whether consensual or otherwise somehow has an effect on her character or work. Just a few days back rumour was circulating on Twitter about the existence of a video in which South African businessman and husband of Former Miss SA, Romeo Khumalo, was engaged in sexual acts with a young male celebrity. The conversation became more about how the video would likely ruin his wife Basetsana Khumalo’s career, how she is involved in the cover-up, how she has been losing weight and drinking too much. Basically, Romeo’s transgressions are now Basetsana’s mess?!

So a woman does not even need to have sex to be judged anymore, just being in the general area where sexual relations occur or just a picture proving you do have sexual parts is enough to tank your whole career and life at this point.

 

LEAVE A COMMENT

Comments

image

Poachers have broken into Botswana’s p Read more...

10 Aug, 2018 at 01:58 PM

image

In a sign that Botswana is likely to cli Read more...

02 Jul, 2018 at 09:26 AM

image

DAR ES SALAAM - DIRECTIVES on online for Read more...

02 Jul, 2018 at 01:24 PM

image

The Namibian Ministry of Agriculture, W Read more...

28 Mar, 2018 at 06:05 PM

image

Gaborone – The Botswana government has Read more...

25 May, 2018 at 02:35 PM

image

Windhoek- President of the Republic of N Read more...

19 Nov, 2018 at 08:43 AM

image

Windhoek – A lack of funds has been bl Read more...

19 Nov, 2018 at 08:40 AM

image

Lusaka – Zambia is on the verge of los Read more...

19 Nov, 2018 at 08:39 AM

image

Windhoek - President of the Democratic R Read more...

19 Nov, 2018 at 08:37 AM

image

Gaborone- In a sign that the official ti Read more...

19 Nov, 2018 at 08:35 AM

image

Heads of state and ministers who travell Read more...

30 Jul, 2018 at 02:01 PM

image

African sovereign funds represent only 3 Read more...

24 Sep, 2018 at 09:52 AM

image

Adjudicating match officials are not a n Read more...

31 Aug, 2018 at 09:02 AM

image

Former South African president, Kgalema Read more...

26 Sep, 2018 at 09:54 AM

image

Gaborone - Botswana’s celebrated hip-h Read more...

04 Aug, 2018 at 03:19 PM